this norwegian lesbian commentator is Very relatable
Category: Uncategorized
If israel’s embarrassing weeabo act wins i’m gonna flip
IT’S HERE
IT’S HERE
THE HOLIEST DAY OF THE YEAR
IT’S EUROVISION
IT’S MEANT TO FINISH AT 23:30 AND I THOUGHT THAT MEANT THE ENTIRE SHOW BUT MAYBE IT JUST MEANS THIS FUCKING FLAG PARADE BOLLOCKS
Can’t believe that Ukraine have entered with Draco from My Immortal
Spain have boldly chosen to reenact the scene where Troy and Gabriella meet in High School Musical and we’re supposed to believe that they’re impressive singers and also have a shred of chemistry
Slovenia is just that embarrassing gif of Katy Perry trying to dance and be woke and just looking really white
Lithuania’s song will be used in bread commercials for years to come
Austria clearly tore his shirt earlier and is now holding it together with approx 8m of duct tape but the song is a floor filler so I’ll forgive him his sartorial clumsiness
Can someone tell Estonia that their €65,000 would have been better spent on writing a song that didn’t sound like a deleted scene from Phantom of the Opera
I imagine that the Norwegian government has some kind of dirt on Alexander Rybak’s family because there’s a kind of death behind his eyes that you don’t normally see until song 20
Portugal is doing their best to ensure that they don’t have to foot the bill for this shit next year
OK no you know what, the UK entry just got audio bombed and just powered through like a pro while singing about not giving up, what a genuine bb and I hope she is doing OK backstage!!
Serbia and Germany both have fantastic hair but alas, my cat is currently running around the room screaming and it sounds better
Albania is the dramatic pirate king I want to sing in a euphoric falsetto at all the triumphant moments of my life
France is definitely a pair of art students at an experimental dance and poetry rally for humanitarian aid and I am LOVING IT
Can’t believe that the Czech Republic guy is skipping his first day of high school for this
Delighted that Denmark have decided to enter with what I can only assume is the theme song to an upcoming film about Viking quintuplets who are separated on a voyage to pillage the shores of England and must battle torturous oceans with the aid of a friendly sea snake to find their family once more
Australia is ADORABLE but now two men are gently nuzzling the presenter’s ears and I’m honestly close to just wishing for the sweet embrace of death
Finland’s song is dull as dishwater but their staging is Christopher Isherwood in space realness and I love it
Bulgaria’s song is the perfect soundtrack to a Scandi-noir series about a ghost in love with someone living, who keeps trying to kill the living person so that they can be together forever. It gives me strong feelings, is what I’m saying.
Moldova, finally serving us that crossover between Dial M for Murder and Catchphrase that we’ve all been craving
Apparently Sweden guy’s mother tried and failed to represent Sweden at Eurovision 5 times, and now her son has taken over the family’s Eurovision duties and blown her out of the water. Presumably she didn’t have a pair of platform trainers, snake hips, and a butt that just won’t quit.
Really hope that the pyrotechnics take mercy on us and burn through all the wires to Hungary’s microphone
It says a lot about Israel’s song that most of the chorus was her doing chicken noises and it was the best bit by far.
The Netherlands is just so stereotypically Dutch. Like, go a bit left field, guys. You’re so well known for the whole gay rock’n’roll cowboy thing. Archetypal Dutch. Do something different.
Ireland is bringing it back to what Eurovision is about; BEING VERY GAY and pretending to play an instrument that isn’t plugged in.
Cyprus is the secret Kardashian sister who had too much talent and was kicked out of the family and is now getting her revenge by performing dressed as Roxxxy Andrews on live TV.
Italy’s song was the best way to close the show, because I couldn’t wait for it to be over.
Your description of Moldova is exactly what I was thinking and couldn’t find the right words to describe
for the next following hours im pure european trash im sorry i don’t make the rules
Chinese TV: We want you but without the gays.
Eurovision, with a feathery boa, sipping on a fruity drink, draped dramatically over a piano on fire, in a rainbow dress: Well, we don’t want you.
Welcome to the opening ceremony of the gay olympics
“I’m sorry… about— I’m sorry about a lot of things. I’m sorry about
all the times I bullied you about your parents, and about Black.”The unexpected apology unsteadies Harry. He doesn’t know what to say, so he reaches out to pat the thestral instead.
“They’re friendly,” he instructs, eventually. “You can pat it. Can I?” Harry moves to touch Malfoy’s hand.
Malfoy
nods and lets Harry guide his pale fingers over the thestral’s back.
After a moment, Harry lets go, and they each carry on petting the
thestral on their own.
This artwork is for the divine @frnklymrshnkly‘s recent @hdconsentfest fic, Purity Control, for being a commenter extraordinaire, #festmodgoals, and an amazing contributor to fandom in every capacity.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING YOU DO.
Artwork by @sadfishkid.
gayspacepirates backup 